After the holiday festivities and countless bad goodies devoured at my work place, I am now back on the no sugar, organic/fresh food kick my doctor placed me on. I did maketh myself sick. It was all worth it.
|This is how I take selfies.|
My life has suffered endless financial back steps and some little strides forward. It's a work in progress. We need not go into further detail. I did have to get brakes on the car and at least I didn't ruin the rotors this time. However, now I must save for struts and shocks. I wish it were studs and cocks. Seriously? Killing it. I can't even. (I learned how to talk TEENAGER over the holiday break.)
|Balance in my checking account|
The dogs had diarrhea butt explosions of proportionate quantities due to a small piece of pork chop. I know. It sounded like a good idea at the time. Merry Christmas to me. Lesson learned. At least I made sure all three of them were on the same page along with the boss's dog we were babysitting for over the break. Yeah. I could have gotten myself fired. He was just relieved it wasn't a virus after I explained the problem this morning at work. His dog poo pooed big piles all over his house too. You're welcome. So we exchanged carpet scrubbing stories. The smell still lingers up my nose. I don't even want to go home tonight because I am certain I will have to scrub again. I have zapped it with
|Violated Dog courtesy of Pinterest|
This picture offends me. I don't know why I used it here.
I just pray no one really shoved a cupcake up its ass and only photoshopped this. I'm going to go with that because thoughts of other theories really saddens me. Maybe it was really pooping and the owner covered it up with a photoshopped cupcake. I have no idea. Disturbing anyone would even put this on Pinterest and even more disturbing that someone would use it in their blog.
Back to the "spoiled rod theory." Yeah. I jacked that up. But I'm not changing it because then I would have to go back and Google the exact correct saying that goes something like "spoil the child spare the rod." So anyway, I spoil mine too, but I'd like to think more so with love and punishment rather than "things." It goes hand in hand. It's amazing what a teenager will do when you take their cell phone away. Shazam!
And believe me...she is not and has not been deprived by any means. She even made mention to me this year that her Facebook was plastered with friends showing off piles of presents under the tree that were past halfway up and out on the floor and bragging about all their expensive things. She told me it was disappointing and she rattled off what was important to her: Christ and family. It made me very proud.
I'm not above someone adorning my presents with this bow, however...
I was surprised by some very nice gifts sent to me and forever grateful. That's what I want Bug to know...gratitude.
And so this year is starting out with no New Year's resolutions. Why? Why disappoint myself if I don't do exactly as I resolve to do. Instead, I will just make goals. Oh, wait. Are they the same?
I had to Google the meaning of New Year's resolutions. I shit you not. This is what came up:
A New Year's resolution is a tradition, most common in the Western Hemisphere but also found in the Eastern Hemisphere, in which a person makes a promise to do an act of self-improvement or something slightly nice, such as opening doors for people beginning from New Year's Day.
I think I almost peed myself.
I am going to go burn off some fat and make a valiant attempt to save some greens in the bank. That's all I have for my goals. I try to dream high and aim low. That way I don't disappoint myself when I miss the mark or come up short. If I don't put numbers on things, I'm a superstar.
Have a Happy New Year!